Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Mom, I'm scared of the wind




¿Quién calma mis miedos?
Siempre he sido miedosa; creí que algun día el miedo se desvanecería.
Desde que soy madre tengo más miedo que nunca.
La mayoría de las frases que pronuncio llevan un 'no' delante.
¿Cuántos 'no' escuchan mis hijas al día?
¿Cuántos 'no' podré tragarme de aquí en adelante?
Soy como un árbol temiendo al tornado.
Pero el tornado está en mi cabeza.
Mejoraré!

Who soothes my fears?
I've always been of a fearful kind; I thought the fear would vanish someday.
Ever since my first daughter was born the fear increased.
Most of my sentences start with a don't.
How many don'ts are my daughters hearing in a day?
How many don'ts can I swallow from now on?
I'm like a firm rooted tree afraid of the tornado that'll come.
This tornado is just in my mind.
I'll be better. Promise.

(The gift: See previous posts / Mira los posts anteriores)

Today's music:
Dinosaur jr, Hüsker Dü, Hellacopters...

18 comments:

la baigo said...

Muchos de los/las que damos la imagen de seguridad en el fondo (y quiza no tanto) nos morimos de miedo...

Una vez leí una frase... "Solo no tiene miedo el que nada tiene que perder".

PD: vuelven las mujeres arbol !!! me encantan

Eleanor said...

And then, just when you think it is all better, your daughter will start worrying about you! Mothers and daughters...so fascinating.

I am a great admirer of your art. I am blinking my eyes and rubbing my nose and hoping that maybe, just maybe, I may win a gift. I choose "I think you've lost something today"...but honestly, I would be delighted to win any of your drawings.

La Ballena Elena said...

De acuerdo con la reflexión de la Baigo.

El que tiene miedo es pq tiene cosas muy buenas que perder

No tengo niños, e imagino que hay miedos que uno no conoce hasta que los vive

Kirsty said...

Beautiful post Esti.

karina said...

Me encanto la foto.
Me pasaba lo mismo con mi primer hijo, ahora que tengo tres relaje un poco, trato de disfrutar mas de de aceptar que la vida es como es.

Aran said...

Esti- me identifico totalmente con lo que dices... y me encanta lo del viento porque yo de pequeña le tenia un miedo terrible al viento. hasta el punto que mis padres me tuvieron que comprar un walkman solo para que no pudiera oir el viento a las noches. terrible. siempre le he tenido miedo a la montaña y los espacios muy abiertos, a la niebla... por que sera?
Y ahora soy madre y estoy todo el tiempo con el "ez". Mi marido es americano pero ya habla euskera, sabe decir "ez"!

louise said...

Perhaps it would help if you thought of all the good things the wind can blow in? Change for the better, autumn leaves, migratory birds are but a few. Oh and maybe it's too late, but I wanted to let you know that my favourite drawing of yours is A's hands. xo lj

Esti said...

louise, it's not too late. Everybody has the whole week to enter the draw! :)

Thanks everybody

Stardust said...

My friend told me she had lots of worries, that disappeared after having kids. I was amazed. I was a real "hippy-happy-go-lucky" UNTIL I had my children. Now I worry all the time (don't-don't-don't echoes). Sometimes it's paralyzing..

Maria said...

I have the same problem of worrying too much about almost everything. I'm a hypocondric, which is soo annoying but I can't help it. I'm looking bright on the future so I hope it gets better:)

Mrs.French said...

There is nothing wrong with being a protective momma. I am this way too.

Jorge said...

El genero humano es un animal asustado y más si tiene crías que proteger. Luego llega Iberdrola y te intenta vender la moto con esos anuncios ridículos de niños felices y resabiados...

Pero todo se pasa por un rato con un discazo de los Hella...

Jorge said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
A Print A Day said...

oh no! i used to be afraid of the wind too when i was a child, especially since the tree branches would hit the windows of my room.

esti, i love your words in this post.

Ciara said...

The things I worried about became insignificant. And I got a whole lot of new ones to replace them! The terrible vulnerability of being a mother: the world will never seem safe again.
But. I trust. And I have to believe. All will be well. I have to!

Jill said...

I am fearful too, always have been, and it helps to know that I am not alone in feeling this way.

lisa s said...

at least you are a STRONG tree with deep roots. the tornado won't really hurt you....
hugs

instantanés said...

Como siempre, me gustan tuas palabras ... Pero, creio que lo que dice La baigo es la verdade "solo no tiene miedo ..." :)