Sunday, October 14, 2012

An unreal time





Sorry for the absence. I have let go too many days without posting here, without pouring thoughts and impressions, without showing you guys any work that I'm doing or anything related to the life I am living. It's been a different and slightly unreal week. First off, I've changed my walls for a few weeks, meaning we had to reorganize and simplify family life overnight, even simplifying my usual chaos in order to move in a simple and imperceptible manner. How different these walls  and these floors sound! How different is the smell of other people's furniture!
Moreover, my grandma has been hospitalized, now improving and on her way to a happy ending, but seeing her frightened, lucid and angry at her own body has moved me more than I can describe. We tell each other that this is how life goes, but needless to say it's always sad and upsetting to see.
And yes, it's raining again.


::

Siento la ausencia. Llevo muchos días sin escribir, sin volcar mis pensamientos e impresiones, sin mostrar nada del trabajo que voy haciendo ni nada de la vida que voy viviendo. Ha sido una semana diferente y ligeramente irreal. Por una parte, he cambiado de paredes por unas semanas, así que de un día para otro hemos tenido que reorganizar la vida familiar y simplificar mi caos particular para poder trasladarlo de una manera sencilla e imperceptible. ¡Qué distintas suenan estas paredes y estos suelos! ¡Qué distinto el olor de los muebles ajenos! 
Por otra parte, mi amama ha estado ingresada en el hospital, ahora ya remontando y con un seguro final feliz, pero haberla visto asustada, lúcida y con su cuerpo en rebeldía me ha conmovido más de lo que puedo describir. Nos decimos unos a otros que esto es lo que toca, pero no por ello deja de ser desolador. 
Y sí, llueve de nuevo.

6 comments:

Georgina said...

I know how you must be feeling concerning your grandmother and her fears and anger. I almost lost my 90 year old mother a few weeks ago, but she's bouncing back, but never to where she was just a couple of months ago. You have my sincerest empathy and sending you many prayers.

This is life and for your grandmother and my mother, it's coming full circle...one we travel everyday. Know the most important thing in anyone's life is time and relationships...they are wonderful things.

Take care.

Siempre,
Georgina

la ninja said...

es desolador.

Unknown said...

Animo Esti. Al cambio te irás adaptando...
Y fuerza para tu amama...que seguro que sigue adelante.
Fuerza

Esti said...

Hi girls! Thanks for your words. My grandma is doing better every day and she'll be home soon and we, her family, couldn't be any happier :)

Ciara Brehony said...

Sorry to hear things have been difficult, but very glad to hear your grandmother is on the mend.
Sending hugs to you, Esti. xxx

Amara Montes said...

Creo que las imagenes de este post dicen todo de tus sensaciones estos días, achucha a tu abuela todo lo que puedas!